Bright spots in the dark

After three hard weeks in which my courage and life energy were under strong pressure, I realised I had better prepare myself for the next 11 weeks of chemotherapy. 

So today I came up with an HITD list, which stands for ‘Highlights In The Darkness’. For every week something to look forward to.

The chemotherapy which I started last week, means for the duration of 12 weeks, every Friday to the hospital to be administered with Paclitacel, plus once in three weeks Carboplatin. In the first week I received both medications, and I now know that during such weeks of a ‘double dose’ I prefer silence and my bed most days. I organised my HITD list accordingly.  In the ‘double dose’ weeks I have now planned presents for myself, to entertain me between naps while I am in bed. During the weeks in-between I hope to be able to get out of bed more, and have an outing in the neighbourhood every now and then. 

I’ll treat myself to the book ‘Russian fairy tales’ by The Tjong Khing, a visit to a museum, and a spin in my camper. The week of 5 July will be the week of the best short films (which by the way I will select carefully as quite a lot of these are about cancer and/or death). The week of 19 July I will have a French week, with all sorts of French delicacies. The week of 30 August will be an English week, with a picknick with scones and liquorice somewhere near or at home and documentaries on beautiful Scotland or Wales. On the HITD list are also a few bonus treats for when the chemo has to be postponed for a week, or when I just need something extra. 

A flexible plan, for, as everyone who loves planning knows: they are there to be altered or adapted when necessary.  Anticipation always gives me energy!